Cycle of Our Souls: Heart's Fire
by Moon Raven2
Summary: Raye meets handsome, kind Jay Dalinger, and their romance will set off an ancient, long-forgotten curse. Part 1 of Cycle of Our Souls.
1. Heart's Fire 1

Cycle of Our Souls: Heart's Fire  
Part I

Moon Raven

aka, M is for Mars

* * *

Disclaimers and the like:  
Hey, guess what? I don't own Sailor Moon! Surprised as hell, aren't ya! As we all know, Sailor Moon is owned by Naoko Takeuchi/Kodansha, TOEI Animation. I'm not intending to steal anything, and I'm definitely not making money from this, so please... don't sue me. 

Anyway, this is my first attempt at writing Sailor Moon fanfic, and so it may suck, and if it sucks badly enough, I'm sure someone will MST it (which would actually be kinda cool... in a totally humiliating sort of way). I know zero Japanese, which means I've only watched the DiC dubbed version of the show, and therefor use the American names and all that. I hope all of you Sailor Moon purists out there don't instantly write me off due to this, because that would be kinda wasteful, wouldn't it?

Sailor Mars is my favorite, so this story is about her. The title comes from a Shawn Mullins song of the same name, and I thought it was kind of appropriate, what with the rebirth of souls being a very strong theme throughout Sailor Moon mythology. Because I can't leave well enough alone, I turned this into a big series featuring each senshi and general, and the next story in the series in Cycle of Our Souls: Heart's Love, about Mina and Malachite. Check it out if you like this one!

Please, please, please tell me what you think about this story, whether your opinion is positive or negative. Feedback is really important to me, and if you don't tell me what you like/dislike, I won't know what to keep/change!

Now, finally, on with the show!

* * *

I can't do this anymore. No, please don't start... don't tell me what I know you're thinking. Don't tell me that everyone feels this way sometimes, that with a little time I can work past it... I don't want to work past it! I want to be normal! I want a life! Why can't anyone understand this? Why can't all of you just let me go?

It's my duty. It's my destiny. It's my damn job. Yes, I know. But it all comes down to one thing: I have no choice! I hate that. I truly, truly hate not being able to choose. I live my life for Serena, I live my life for Crystal Tokyo and for Rini and for a future that I'm not even sure I want. No, I didn't mean that. Of course I want Crystal Tokyo. Of course I want Rini to be born. I just wish I had been given a choice.

I suppose I was, back then... but I had no way of realizing what I was agreeing to. No one did. Who could've known that the Moon Kingdom would be defeated, that Queen Serenity would be forced to send all of us to Earth? Who knew she would be forced to send us to a time when we senshi are... are forced to hide, to pretend to be something we aren't... to pretend to be normal. Gods, to be normal... The irony is almost too painful.

I know this is selfish, and stupid, and unrealistic... and for such a seemingly petty reason! But I just can't forget. I can't forget his eyes or his smile or his voice... and it angers me. I don't want to see him every  
time I close my eyes! I don't want to dream of him every night, and to wake up longing for him every morning! I am more than this. I am a Sailor Senshi, a princess, a priestess, a warrior!

It's not that I don't want to be a Senshi any longer, it's just that I'm so damn sick of having to hide who I am. I gave him up for you, Serena. I gave him up for Crystal Tokyo and for Rini and for a future that I'm afraid of. I gave him up because I loved him so much that I knew one day I would tell him who I am, and that in so doing I would put his life in danger. I knew that if I let myself continue loving him, continue the way I wanted to, then he would be doomed. They've found us before; what's to stop it from happening again?

I am so frightened. I'm afraid of losing myself, of losing Raye Hino, of becoming Sailor Mars in all that I am, have been or will be. There is more to me than Sailor Mars! And there is more to me than loving him. I just have to remember what that is.

End I


	2. Heart's Fire 2

Cycle of Our Souls: Heart's Fire   
Part II 

Raven Moon

aka, M is for Mars 

* * *

Disclaimers:   
Nope, not mine. Oh well, at least I can borrow 'em for a little bit. :) 

One quick comment: all the stuff between the asterisk lines takes place in the so-called "present" time period (which would be just before Sailor Moon S), while the rest of it (unless otherwise labeled) is just a few weeks in the past (a rather alternate universe past, obviously, as none of this happened in the show :). Trust me, give it a bit and you'll understand what I'm talkin' about. 

Comments and (yes) criticisms are always appreciated!!   


* * *

Three Weeks Earlier   
"Oh, Serena, give it a rest! You're never gonna beat Amy at this, so you might as well quit," Raye Hino said good-naturedly to her friend Serena Tsukino. 

"I never quit, Raye! I will beat Amy at this game if it's the last thing I do!" 

Raye rolled her eyes and turned her attention back to the comic book she'd been reading. "I think I should study now anyway," she vaguely heard Amy Anderson, the "brain" of the group, say. 

"You're going to turn into a Chemistry book, Amy," Lita Kino teased. "Why don't we go skating? That's always fun!" 

"Sure you think so, Lita," Serena grumbled under her breath. 

"I think we should go shopping," Mina Aino spoke up. "I heard there's a new store opening in the mall and that they're having a really big grand opening sale!" 

"Hai, and sure as we go some Negaverse creep'll attack. That's exactly how I wanna spend _my_ Saturday," Raye said dryly. 

"That is a point, though, Raye. It does seem every time there's an event in Tokyo that might draw even the smallest of crowds, the Negaverse is somehow involved," Luna, Serena's cat (or is Serena Luna's person?), said. 

"Luna! I was kidding. I just don't want to go to the mall again," Raye told her. 

"Raye!" Serena cried, tossing the video game controller aside. "You never want to go to the mall. We haven't been in almost two weeks and I'm suffering from severe withdrawal." 

Raye sighed in exasperation. "Why do we have to do anything at all? I mean, why can't we just all go do our own thing and not worry about everyone else for a change? Novel concept, I know," she said bitterly. 

The girls shared a Look, each one thinking the same thing. Luna finally put it to words: "Is something wrong, Raye?" she asked gently. 

"Iie, nothing. I'm fine... just really tired. I think I'll go home and get some rest... maybe some time in front of the fire will help me sort out my thoughts. I'm sorry I snapped at you guys." She slid off Serena's bed and dropped the manga on the desk. "So I'll see you guys tomorrow, I guess." 

"Sayonara, Raye. Ja ne!" they called as she hurried out the door. 

"She's been acting strange all week," Lita said once she was gone. 

"I know... much more bossy and snappy than usual," Serena put in, turning back to the video game. 

"Should we try to figure out what's wrong with her?" Mina asked, her eyes lighting up at the thought of snooping on Raye. 

"I think she'll tell us when she's ready to," Amy said. "Maybe it's something she feels she can work out on her own. We should trust her." 

"Well," Lita said after a moment, "if she gets much worse, we'll have to _make_ her tell us. I mean, it's not like we aren't her best friends." 

"True, but I agree with Amy in this case: we will let Raye keep her own counsel until she's ready to talk," Luna said. Her tone left no room for argument. 

********************************   
I remember that day well. It was the first day I ever saw him, the day my life began -- this phase of my life, I mean. This... strange, dreamy, alive phase. I remember looking up and seeing him, all fierce, knowing blue eyes... I remember watching him watching me, watching me as though he wanted to learn   
me, watching me as though he could see into my soul and instantly know all my secrets, all my fears and dreams. 

It was disconcerting, seeing him there, seeing him and yet not knowing him. I feel sometimes as though I still don't know him... and now I suppose I never will. He spoke to me, his voice mildly derisive in that way which so got under my skin. He always knew just what to say to get on my nerves. Gods, how I love him, how I need him! And I don't need anyone. No, that's not true. I need my friends... I need this temple... and, though I don't like admitting it, I need Sailor Mars. She is as much a part of me as anything else. 

Iie! I was fine before Sailor Mars, and I can be fine again without her. But... was I really? Was I fine? I was alone, and I would be alone again. Could I do that? Now that I know the difference, now that I've felt the sweetness of knowing there are people who love me and care for me and would give their lives for me, can I go back to being lonely Raye Hino? 

I will have to go back to being Raye Hino without Jay Dalinger. I don't want to, but I must... and I will. Just as I must be a Sailor Senshi. And just as I will... always.   
******************************** 

Raye stood up from her position on the floor in front of the temple fire with a frustrated sigh. Despite her best efforts, the flames had revealed nothing to help her work past the mood she had been in lately, a mood that had been best described by the ever-eloquent Serena the day before: "Raye's in a funk." 

Such a comment only served to make Raye angrier. What did Serena know about it anyway? It wasn't any of her business! Wasn't she allowed to be in a bad mood every now and then? The dark-haired girl sighed again and shook her head, thinking that this particular bad mood was lasting longer than most. 

She felt bad about the way she had spoken to her friends earlier, but sometimes she felt like a drone - always going along with the group, always being apart of the group. Raye was traditionally a loner, and while she enjoyed her friends and was glad for them, she sometimes needed her space. Now, it seemed, was one of those times. 

Trying to relieve her tension through different means, Raye grabbed a broom and began sweeping the floor as though it were the cause of her mood. She jabbed the brush into corners with a vengeance, muttering the whole time about Chad and his inability to keep anything clean. 

"Whatever the poor floor has done, I'm sure it would apologize if you would only give it a chance. There surely isn't a reason to punish it so," a deep, lightly mocking voice said from behind her. 

Raye whirled around, startled and angry at the intrusion. She opened her mouth to chastise the speaker, but ended up saying nothing, her jaw hanging open in surprise as she stared up at him. Her mind whirled through images of intense, uncanny blue eyes and curly -- _no, not so much curly as wavy,_ she   
corrected herself -- blond hair and she tried desperately to regain her composure. "I... the floor did nothing, naturally," she said, throwing a shield of haughtiness up between them to protect herself from those damn eyes of his. "I have been very busy with other matters lately and haven't been able to devote the proper attention to such things as sweeping. Now, is there something I can help you with?" 

He slowly arched an eyebrow and replied, "That depends. I'm looking for a young woman by the name of Raye Hino. Do you know her?" 

Raye regarded him carefully for a moment. "Who's asking?" she said suspiciously, tucking a lock of purple-black hair behind her ear. 

His lips twisted into a strange smile -- strange, but not unkind -- and he bowed politely. "Jay Dalinger at your service, Hino-san. I have come to request guidance from a wise miko, and you seem to fit that description perfectly." 

Her brow creased in a frown and she turned away to return the broom to its place. "Don't try to flatter me, Dalinger-san. If you haven't come to our temple with a serious purpose, then I must ask you to leave. We do not take people mocking the sanctity of this place lightly. You understand, of course?" 

"Gomen nasai, Hino-san, forgive me," he said, his tone losing its scornful edge, "I do come for a serious purpose, but I'm afraid I've started off terribly wrong. I was startled, you see... I was told that the miko of the Cherry Hill Temple was wise and rather quick-tempered, but no one told me of your beauty. And that is not simply flattery. So, shall we begin again? My name is Jay Dalinger and I've come to make an offering at your temple." He held out a bouquet of white roses so delicately, perfectly, innocently beautiful that Raye, turning back to face him, caught her breath in wonder. 

"They are magnificent," she whispered. "I've never seen flowers of such loveliness and perfection!" She gasped again as she stared down into the bouquet: each flower was flushed bright pink in the center, almost as if the blossom contained a flame within itself. "The Gods will truly be pleased. Domo arigato, Dalinger-san." 

He looked a little sheepish. "I'm afraid... I'm afraid I lied to you, Hino-san," he said after a long silence. 

Her head snapped up, onyx eyes blazing. "_Lied_? What, _exactly_, did you lie about?" she asked, her tone tight with anger and disbelief. 

Jay Dalinger cleared his throat and shifted uneasily from one foot to another. Raye was amazed at his transformation: those blue eyes, which before had seemed to unabashedly peer into her very soul, would not rise to meet her own, and his voice, so confident and derisive just a moment ago, was small and chagrined. All in all, he looked like a small child who had been caught with his hand in the cookie jar after having been warned away from it quite frequently. 

"When I told you I was startled by your beauty? Well, it wasn't a complete lie, because I'm startled anew each time I see you... because I _have_ seen you before... and _that_ is the actual reason I'm here. The flowers aren't for the Gods, they're for you. I thought you would be angry if I came up here like that, seeming like some love-sick fool who hasn't sense enough to know that you aren't the type of girl to be taken in by flowers and candy, so I decided to make the offering to the Gods instead. I'm sorry to have   
deceived you in the first place, Raye-san, but I had to tell you the truth, because you deserve that much," he said, finally glancing up to meet her fiery gaze at the very end of this speech. 

Raye, for her part, had listened to his admission with ever-widening eyes. He had brought these amazing flowers, each one a gift from the Gods, to _her_? "You're right: I most likely would have thrown you out on your ear had you come in here waving this bouquet around and offering me invitations to dinner and the movies... but still..." she trailed off, unsure whether to be furious that he would lie about something as sacred as an offering to the Gods, or to be thrilled that he would go to such lengths to impress her. "I'm not sure what to say," she finally admitted. 

His lips turned up in a charming, boyish grin. "Say you'll have dinner with me tonight." 

"Dalinger-san--" 

"Jay, please," he interrupted. 

"Jay-san, I'm a very busy person. I have the temple to look after, my grandfather to keep out of trouble, school, my friends..." 

"Well if not tonight, then tomorrow?" Jay asked hopefully. 

Raye frowned, realizing that this young man was not the type to beg. Indeed, he seemed just as strong-willed and prideful as she herself was. _Gods, I know he won't give up until I say yes!_ she thought. "Hai, Jay-san, dinner tomorrow night." 

He smiled brilliantly, and she couldn't help but return the expression. "I'll pick you up at eight, all right? And wear something stunning: there's no way I'm taking you to some place like McDonald's." With that and a bow, he swept from the temple, leaving Raye to puzzle over the encounter as she made her slow, leisurely way back to her bedroom. 

"Well _he_ was certainly interesting," she whispered, carefully arranging the stunning roses in a cut crystal vase on her bureau. She gave a little shiver of delight and, surprised at her sudden eagerness, ran to the closet to look for something to wear tomorrow. "Kuso," she muttered after a moment, "I guess I'll be going to the mall after all." 

******************************   
I laugh now when I think of it. I laugh when I remember that smile of his when I said yes... I laugh when I remember how excited I was, just like a little girl let loose in a candy shop. In a way, actually, I was. Jay, for all his observant seriousness and stubborn ways, was like a breath of fresh air. 

I remember that night, the magic of it. He brought me more roses, these red as the flame of my Sacred Fire, then we went to some fancy restaurant in downtown Tokyo, the likes of which I had only read about in magazines. I think I fell in love with him that night, with his eyes that danced when he laughed -- a sound so rare that, when it was heard, seemed the most beautiful in the Universe -- and his hair that kept falling over his eyes, causing him to brush it back in an endearing, boyish manner. Yes, that was my Jay:   
boyish, charming and laughing one minute; serious, watchful and silent the next. We are a lot a like, Jay Dalinger and I. We are fire: nurturing, warm and life-giving, but, when necessary, fierce, angry and proud. 

I'm laughing at myself right now, for my own thoughts remind me of a poem by that American, Poe. Something about... Annabel Lee... "I was a child, and she was a child, in this kingdom by the sea. But we loved with a love that was more than love..." And if I remember correctly, that poem didn't exactly   
have a happy ending. It's a shame, for I do so love happy endings.   
******************************* 

End II 


	3. Heart's Fire 3

Cycle of Our Souls: Heart's Fire   
Part III 

Raven Moon 

* * *

Disclaimers:   
Nope, not mine. Oh well, at least I can borrow 'em for a little bit. :) 

Hey, y'all, it's me again. :) I hope you've enjoyed the story so far (short as it's been), and I just have a quick note or two for this section. The text between the little "@-" symbols (which look like roses to me) takes place in the time of the Silver Millennium, in case you can't tell. I use the Japanese names (or spellings thereof) simply because they seem like the "real" names to me (as I'm sure they do to most of you as well), and they just seem to fit better in this time period. The only exceptions to this are with Kunzite/Malachite and Usagi/Serena. I'm sorry, but I like "Malachite" better; much more forceful. And "Serena" is just plain pretty. Poetic license, damn it! :) 

Anyway, like before the text between the lines of "*" symbols takes place in the "present" (sometime between SMR and SMS) and is mostly just Raye's thoughts. Everything else is a few weeks before this, and if that changes, it will be noted so don't worry. 

If you're enjoying the story (or even if you're hating it, but if that's the case, then why are you still reading, silly??) please write me! Please!! 

Thank you, drive through.   


* * *

@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-   
Minako, Princess of Venus and leader of the Sailor Senshi, streaked down the halls of the Moon Palace and began banging on the elaborately carved door barring her way. "Rei! Rei-chan, open the door! They're going to be here any minute and I'll not be late because of your vanity!" she cried. 

Rei, Princess of Mars, threw open the door and glared at her friend. "_My_ vanity? Minako, if I remember correctly, you cut our training session short by _three hours_ this afternoon in order to get ready." 

The blond girl shrugged and turned away. "Come on, Rei-chan, we're going to be late. Ami and Makoto are waiting for us in the ball room. Mako-chan told me they weren't going into the receiving hall until we got there, and if the generals arrive first they'll never forgive us!" 

"Why are they waiting for us in the ball room? Seems like an awfully silly place to--" 

"I didn't _ask_, Rei!" Minako cried, grabbing her friend's hand and fairly dragging her down the hall. "All Makoto said was, 'If you're not back in less than five minutes with Rei-chan, I'll send my Thunder Dragon after you!' So we have two minutes left." 

Rei's eyes widened. "_Nani_?!? Only two? Gods, we better hurry!" 

Minako let out an exasperated sigh. "That's what I've been trying to tell you!" Before these words were even out, however, the dark-haired girl had run past her. 

"Hurry, Minako-chan!" she called over her shoulder. "I don't want to get fried!" 

* * *

Makoto, Princess of Jupiter, paced nervously back and forth. While Rei was busy questioning the logic of waiting in the ballroom, Makoto figured it was the only place in the entire kingdom where she could pace and not run out of floor. 

"Mako-chan, relax," Ami, the Mercurial Princess, said to her friend. "Rei and Minako will be here soon, then we can go join the queen and princess in the receiving hall. We won't be late." 

"I'm not worried about being late, Ami-chan," Makoto fairly growled. "I'm worried about..." She threw her hands up in the air and resumed pacing. 

"About meeting the generals? Whatever for?" 

She sighed and shook her head fiercely, the ponytail she always wore her chestnut hair in nearly whipping her in the face. "You wouldn't understand." 

Ami seemed hurt by this answer. "Do you all think I'm not as interested in those of the opposite sex as you are? Just because I concentrate more of my energies on my work doesn't mean I don't notice men! I've heard just as many rumors as you have about Prince Endymion's protectors and, yes, I'm a little   
nervous about meeting them too." 

Makoto gaped at her studious friend. "_You_, Ami-chan?? Well, great, now I feel a whole heck of a lot better," she said sarcastically. If Ami was nervous, then there was certainly no hope for the rest of the senshi. 

Just then, Rei, followed by a disgruntled-looking Minako, burst into the room. "Are we late? Don't kill us, Mako-chan!" the Martian princess cried. 

"No, you're not late... but let's go. Ami-chan just admitted to me that's she's nervous, so if we don't go now I think I might pass out." 

"_Ami's_ nervous?" Minako squeaked, trying to force down a giggle. "If that's the case, then there's no hope for the rest of us!!" 

Makoto grinned. "That's what I was thinking too." 

Queen Serenity's two feline advisors, Artemis and Luna, padded silently into the room. "Are you girls ready?" Luna asked. "The prince and his party are expected to arrive shortly. Come along." Without waiting for a reply, the cats turned to leave, knowing -- or at least hoping -- the senshi wouldn't be far behind. 

"Do you think they're really as handsome as everyone says?" Minako hissed to Makoto as they stood in the receiving hall before Queen Serenity and her daughter of the same name. 

"Iie; no one is as handsome as everyone says _they_ are," Makoto whispered back. 

Suddenly there was a flash of light, and five men appeared before the assembled royal party. Makoto gasped. "I was wrong," she muttered to Minako, who was struggling to keep her chin from hitting the polished marble of the floor. 

"Welcome, Prince Endymion of Earth. This meeting between our planet and yours has been long in coming, and we look forward to a prosperous relationship. Let me introduce you to my daughter and her senshi, then you may introduce to us your guardians," Queen Serenity said in her gentle, soothing voice. She motioned to the lovely blond girl standing beside her and said, "This is my daughter, Princess Serenity." The princess curtsied low. "This is Minako, Princess of Venus and the leader of our senshi, and the Soldier of Love." Minako stepped forward and copied her friend's gesture. "This is Rei, Princess of Mars and our second in command and Senshi of Offence." Rei imitated Mi-nako elegantly. "Next is Makoto, Princess of Jupiter and the Senshi of Defense." Ma-koto's curtsy was brief and businesslike… she did hate such formality. "And last, but most certainly not least, is Ami, Princess of Mercury and the Senshi of Knowledge." Ami's curtsy was as fluid as the element she controlled. 

The prince and his guardians bowed to each lady in turn before Endymion said, "We were most honored by your invitation, Your Majesty, and I hope we are able to form a peaceful understanding between our long-estranged kingdoms. My generals," he said, pointing to each in turn, "are Head General Malachite,   
Jadeite, Nephrite and Zoisite." 

There was more bowing and curtsying all around until at last the queen said, "Perhaps you and your generals would like a tour of our palace, Prince Endymion?" 

He smiled brightly. "We would enjoy that greatly, Your Majesty." 

She nodded smoothly. "Serena, would you and the senshi please escort our guests around the palace? You may all get to know one another better along the way, and perhaps even stop at the training grounds." 

Serena shared a glance with her four friends then grinned at her mother. "We would love to! Come along, Prince Endymion, and I'll show you the most beautiful place in all the Universe!" 

As they walked, they gradually melted from two distinct groups of Moon-dwellers and Earthlings into five smaller ones. The prince instantly fascinated the Moon Princess, and they set off into the grounds, Serena telling him excitedly about the lovely fountains. 

Minako felt drawn to Malachite, with his exotic white hair and stern manner. It wasn't long, however, before her bubbly personality had won him over, and they found themselves meandering toward the training grounds, engaged in a heated discussion over their various attacks. 

Makoto, for her part, couldn't take her eyes off the tall, charismatic Nephrite. She smiled at him, feeling rather shy, and asked if he would like to visit the moon's planetarium. "I heard you were interested in the stars," she told him hastily. He liked the idea, and so off they went. 

Ami, though she would most likely never admit it to her friends, found herself instantly attracted to the quiet Zoisite. It wasn't long before they made their way to the library and were engrossed in a challenging game of chess. 

And so Rei and Jadeite were left wandering the corridors of the Moon Palace together. Rei smiled at him and said, "It looks like we've been abandoned, hmm? I guess everyone found better things to do..." 

He matched her smile with one of his own. "It truly is beautiful here, Lady Mars. I had heard rumors, of course, but nothing could compare with reality..." 

There was something in his voice that made her stop suddenly and turn to look at him. She studied his clear azure eyes for a long time before saying, "Perhaps you would like to see the gardens? Our roses are some of the most beautiful anywhere... next to those of Mars, of course." 

"That would be perfect. I love flowers... they're so peaceful and innocent. The Universe would be a wonderful place if it was just children, dogs and flowers," he said softly. 

She laughed. "I know a cat or two who would disagree with you there." 

"I'm sure you do," he said, amused. "So shall I amend my statement? The Universe would be a wonderful place if it was just children, dogs, flowers and cats." 

"Much better." They walked among the flower beds in silence for a while before Rei said, "You'll notice that these beds here," she pointed all around them, "are all shades of light blue... you can see that they form the symbol for Mercury. This is Ami-chan's bed. And then there's orange and blue for Venus, and mine are over there... see the red and blue Martian symbol? Next there's green and pink for Jupiter, purple and black for Saturn, dark blue and yellow for Uranus, dark green and dark blue for Neptune, and then the deep purple-blue and red for Pluto. One for each of the senshi, see?" 

Each bed was beautifully and artfully arranged using each of the Scout's colors, and forming the symbol for her planet in elegant, harmonious curves. As all things on the moon, they were cast in the dreamy, silver light that seemed to make everything a little more romantic and lovely. Jadeite stood there next to the comely Martian princess and looked out over the moonscape, and at the Earth hanging big and blue in the dark sky above them, for a long time before saying, puzzled, "There are other senshi besides the four of you?" 

"Oh, yes, of course. We are the Inner Senshi, those who protect the princess herself. The Outer Senshi guard the Universe from outside attacks." She frowned. "We don't see them much, which is rather a bit of a shame. I'm sure Minako would enjoy training with them: she's obsessed with her duty, you know." Suddenly feeling as though she'd said too much, Rei blushed. "Don't tell her I told you that." 

He smiled, something he found himself doing quite a bit around this girl. "No, of course not. Malachite-kun is the same way, so I understand perfectly." 

"Yes, they seem rather well matched. No one stands a better chance of lightening him up than Minako-chan. The roses are through here, come on!" She set off at a run past the beds for Neptune and Pluto, and Jadeite followed, laughing.   
@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@- 

Raye woke up, the smile still on her lips, and stretched luxuriously. It had been a lovely dream, one of the few she'd ever had about the Silver Millennium. But one thing confused her... could those have possible been the Dark Kingdom Generals the queen was so warmly greeting? And they had come with Darien, no less. She puzzled over this for a moment, wondering what pieces she was missing, and then let out a sigh. _Oh well,_ she thought, _it was still a lovely dream... and I with _Jadeite_? Hmmm... I would've thought Malachite more my style._

Jadeite... now, as she thought and thought, she could vaguely remember him from her past... and yes, she _remembered_ showing him the Moon Kingdom's beautiful gardens. She closed her eyes and tried to imagine his face but... came up empty. She could see him, tall and broad-shouldered, and hear him, that slightly raspy voice that had always sent chills down her spine, but she couldn't see his _face_. It was as if... as if someone had gone into her head and surgically removed that particular memory. She tried to imagine the Jadeite she remembered fighting with Amy and Serena, but with the same results. 

It didn't matter anyway, she supposed. If the Dark Kingdom Generals had once been Prince Endymion's royal guard, they had betrayed him. And betrayal was something Raye couldn't abide. Whatever had happened between she and Jadeite back in the Silver Millennium was ancient history... and besides, Jadeite was dead. Or so everyone assumed: he hadn't been seen since his abysmal failure to destroy the Scouts at the airport almost two years ago. 

Suddenly she heard a rustling in the bushes outside her window. Raye's eyes narrowed and she concentrated her sixth sense, trying to find the source, making sure it wasn't evil... She laughed brightly and ran to the window, throwing it open to a warm and sweet-smelling night lit by the full moon. 

"What are you doing here?" she whispered to him, a delighted smile stretched across her pretty face. 

"I missed you," he whispered back. "I didn't get to see you all weekend, ya know!" 

"It's not my fault you went skiing this weekend, Jay Dalinger," she told him, her voice lightly teasing. 

"Can I come in?" he asked, his indigo eyes asking for far more than just entry to her bedroom. 

Pretending she didn't understand the full ramifications of this request, she held out a hand. "Hai, come on. Would you like some tea? Grandpa baked muffins today, I think. He makes some of the best muffins in the world and--" Her ramblings were cut off abruptly by a deep, penetrating kiss, the type of   
kiss that controls the senses and leaves one gasping for air. She felt his tongue brush against hers, heard his low, soft moan, and pushed him away as gently as possible. "Jay," she said quietly, "I've only known you for a little over a week. Don't you think it's a little soon to be making out in my bedroom?" 

Though her eyes twinkled with amusement, he understood how serious she was and he nodded, taking a step away. "I had a dream about you," he said, deciding a change of subject was in order. 

She cocked an eyebrow at him and slid into the kimono she wore as a robe. "Did you?" she asked, always interested in dreams. 

"Hai. I don't remember much about it... just... comfort and peace and you." 

To her surprise, Raye found herself blushing. "Sounds lovely," she finally said, unable to meet his intense blue eyes. 

"Yes, you are," he told her, lifting her chin with the tip of his index finger. 

"Jay no baka!" she cried, the blush deepening. 

He laughed and put his strong arms around her slender waist, pulling her close. "What can I say? It's the truth. You have me under your spell, sweet miko." 

"Miko don't cast spells." 

"You do," he said, gazing down into her eyes, which seemed the color of dark amethysts beneath the moonlight that filtered gently into the room. "You cast spells with your eyes and your hair and your laugh. You are a spell, my little firefly." 

She stiffened slightly at these words. "Why do you call me that? 'Firefly'?" Could he know about her ability to control fire as Sailor Mars? She didn't see how, but anything was possible with Jay Dalinger. 

Jay's brow creased in confusion at her reaction to the nickname. "Because of your fire meditations... and the fire I see burning in your soul. If you don't like it, I won't call you that anymore." 

"No, I like it... it suits me. I was just making sure you weren't calling me a pyromaniac or something," Raye told him with a grin, pressing her cheek gently against his broad chest and wrapping her arms around him. "So how about that tea?" she asked after a long, comfortable moment. 

His chin was rested on the top of her head, her velvety black locks tickling his skin, and he knew he never wanted to move. "Iie, firefly, I have all I want right here. All I've ever wanted," he whispered. 

Normally words such as those would have angered the independent and spirited Raye Hino: she was no one's possession, no one to be "had". But for some reason, when Jay said them she was filled with a sense of warmth and comfort, as though this was how things were supposed to be. She smiled and held him tighter, content to be his, content in the knowledge that those words didn't mean she was his possession, but instead his completion. And, some part of her knew, he was hers. 

********************************   
_Completion_. How the word mocks me now. Hai, Jay Dalinger was my completion, and I his, and now I wonder if either of us will ever be whole again. Before I met him, I used to laugh at such things; that American film, for example, with its oh-so-famous line, "You complete me." Serena and Lita and Mina all thought it was so romantic, so very kawaii, while I, Raye Hino, cynic extraordinaire, saw it as nothing but romantic twaddle. "One must complete oneself," that was my view. 

What a fool I was, what a child. Yes, of course one must be able to stand on one's own, but sometimes... sometimes you find that one person who can help make that standing a little easier. Not a crutch, exactly, but just a... a support. You can survive without it, but life just isn't as easy, isn't as fulfilling. 

I remember going to the art museum with Serena one time. We stopped at the Claude Monet exhibit, and all she could say was, "It's all blurry and jumbled. What a mess!" Serena is not a stupid person, I know that, but I also know that her interest in art is somewhat limited -- not because she doesn't appreciate the beauty of a painting, but just because she prefers art to be straight-forward. "Things should look like what they're supposed to be," she explained to me as we left. 

Then, only a few weeks later, I was at that same exhibit with Jay. We stopped and discussed the fluidity of Monet's rivers, the passion of his oceans, the joy of his gardens, and the serenity of his snowscapes. It was a magical day, and one so much more rewarding than the trip with Serena. Not because Serena is stupid, or bad company, but because Serena isn't Jay, and Jay is the one who understands me. Jay is the one who completes me. Gods, I told myself I wouldn't go there, but I suppose it's too late now: the words are already written. I should've used a pencil. 

If only forgetting was as easy as erasing the marks of graphite on paper. ******************************* 

End III 


	4. Heart's Fire 4

Cycle of Our Souls: Heart's Fire   
Part IV 

Raven Moon 

* * *

Disclaimers:   
Nope, not mine. Oh well, at least I can borrow 'em for a little bit. :) 

Hey, everyone, this note really will be quick, I promise! As always, the text between the lines of "*" symbols is the present (right between SMR and SMS), and is mostly Raye's thoughts. The stuff between the lines of "@-" symbols is all in the Silver Millennium. And the stuff without any little lines of symbol-thingies around it is just a few weeks in the past. 

I've tried to correct any typos that may be present, but a few stubborn little buggers might still be hanging around, so try not to worry about them. 

Feeeeeedbaaaaaaaaaack! Please. :) 

Have a nice day. :)   


* * *

"Sooo, are you planning on telling us about this mystery man of yours or not?" Serena demanded of Raye the next afternoon as they stood around Lita's kitchen while she made them lunch. 

"Yeah, Raye, you've been going out with him for over a week and we don't even know his name yet!" Lita complained. 

"Is he smart?" Amy wanted to know. 

"Is he kawaii?" Mina asked. 

"Of course he's kawaii. That's why she hasn't told us: she's afraid you'll try to steal him!" Lita told the blond. "She knows how boy-crazy you are." 

"Yeah, well, at least I don't compare every guy I see to my old boyfriend!" Mina replied angrily. 

"That's because you don't _have_ an old boyfriend." 

"Guys! Will you please stop arguing! Gods, and you complain about Serena and I!" Raye cried before Lita and Mina could get into a tongue war. "His name is Jay Dalinger, and yes, he's smart a_nd_ cute. And no, he looks nothing like Lita's old boyfriend, though she compares him to so many different guys that I'm not exactly sure what he _actually_ looked like," she said teasingly. 

"Ohhh," Lita began happily, "he was tall and dark and--" 

"Lita!" the other girls cried in unison. She stuck her tongue out at them and went back to the curry chicken she was making. 

"So when can we meet him, Raye?" Serena asked cheerfully. 

"Ummm... how about... never?" she answered just as brightly. 

"Never!? Nani?!" she wailed. "But why not? Don't you like us anymore?" 

"Of course I like you... it's just that I know how you get." 

"And how's that?" Lita asked with a frown. 

"Well... you kinda had a point about what you said to Mina," Raye explained carefully. 

"Raye, I would never steal your boyfriend! You know that!" Mina cried, hurt. 

"Nai, that's not what I meant. I know you wouldn't steal him, at least not on purpose, but... I don't know. All of you might overwhelm him. I imagine it wouldn't be easy for a guy to meet the whole lot of us, ne? Darien's even still a little nervous when we're all together." 

Serena nodded emphatically. "He is. And he's around us as Tuxedo Mask, too! He says that we're all so close that it's intimidating to try to be a part of that. I've tried explaining that I'm just as close, if not closer, to him... but he doesn't listen. He says it's different." 

"Exactly," Raye agreed. "It's not that I don't want him to meet you guys, it's just that I don't want to scare him off. I mean, certainly all of you would be... what, sizing him up? That's gotta be nerve-wracking." 

"Well..." Serena began thoughtfully, "maybe you could introduce him to Darien first, and they could become friends, and Darien could be his... oh, his ally! You know, since they'd be in the same situation." 

"Ok, so, you're suggesting I introduce my current boyfriend to my _exboyfriend_ in the hopes that they become friends? But of course, that'll all be ok when I explain to him that Darien and I weren't meant to be because of the fact that he was in love with the princess I was -- and still am -- sworn to protect back in the Silver Millennium. Hai, Serena, that'll go over _real_ well." 

Mina giggled. "She's got a point, Serena. I think you're just gonna have to face the bullet, Raye. Bring him over sometime and we promise we'll be good! Don't we, minna?" 

"Hai, Raye, we promise!" they cried in near-unison. 

The dark-haired girl was forced to laugh. "All right, all right, I'll call him right now and invite him for lunch. Serena, why don't you call Darien? You did have a minor point about that ally thing." She agreed, and it was less than half an hour later when the doorbell rang. 

"Muffin!" Serena said upon opening the door. "Come in! Everyone's in the kitchen, and Lita's cooking and it smells divine! I'm so hungry. We're just waiting for Raye's friend Jay to show up, then we can eat." 

Darien laughed and followed his girlfriend to the kitchen. "I feel sorry for the poor guy, having to meet all of you at once." 

"Nai, Darien, we promised to behave!" Mina told him. "We'll be sweet and angelic and--" 

"Calm?" Amy supplied quietly, interrupting her boisterous friend. 

"Calm is good," Raye said. 

"I can do calm!" Serena cried. 

Raye cringed, and was almost sorry when the doorbell rang -- she wasn't sure if she wanted to go through with this or not. "Remember, minna: sweet, angelic and _calm_!" With that, she ran through Lita's living room and opened the door. 

There stood Jay, a bouquet of exquisite yellow roses in his hand. "Kon'nichi wa, little firefly," he said with a smile. 

"Kon'nichi wa, Jay, they're beautiful!" 

"I'm glad you like them, but they're not for you." 

She frowned. "What?" 

"They're for Lita. _These_," he said, pulling another bouquet from behind his back, "are for you." They were red again, red as blood, but such a violent image was far, far from Raye's mind as she embraced him with a laugh. 

"Come in, come in... we're all in the kitchen. Let me warn you: my friends are great people, all of them, and they've promised to be calm, but... well, they're very... spirited. I hope you don't mind lots of happy people." 

He laughed. "No, I don't mind happy people." 

"Then you should be fine," she replied as they entered the kitchen. Lita had her back to them, busy at the stove, while Serena was engrossed in conversation with Darien and Amy was working on her new laptop. Mina, however, had been watching the doorway anxiously ever since Raye left, and now she cried, "She's back! Wake up, she's back!" 

"Ohh, Gods," Raye muttered under her breath. With a stoic smile, she introduced everyone to Jay. "The loud one is Mina, the cooking one is Lita, Amy's over there typing away, Serena's the meatball headed one, and that's Darien, her boyfriend." 

Mina and Serena frowned at this introduction, and the latter said, "Raye's told us absolutely nothing about you." 

Jay laughed. "I'm not surprised. She's not very forthcoming with information, our Raye." He held the roses out to Lita and she blushed deeply. "These are for you, Lita. I thought they would make a lovely centerpiece." 

"Domo arigato, Jay," she replied. Turning to find a vase, she whispered to Mina, "I like him!" 

Indeed, Jay seemed to be a hit with the entire group. His knowledge of computers impressed Amy, his jokes sent Mina into fits of giggles, his passion for video games rivaled Serena's own, and his gardening expertise -- roses being his specialty -- captured Darien's attention. 

Raye sat back, watching Jay use his considerable charm on her friends, and frowned slightly. She wasn't surprised they all liked him so much, but it created a conflict in her mind. If he was to become a permanent fixture in their group, what would happen if their Sailor Scout alter-egos were needed? They obviously couldn't transform in front of him, and she couldn't even imagine his reaction if all six suddenly remembered a vague "previous engagement". 

Suddenly she realized Lita was talking to her. "Nani?" she asked her tall friend. 

"You haven't heard a word I've said, have you?" Lita demanded angrily. 

"Hai..." Raye said slowly. "I heard you... I just wasn't exactly... listening," she admitted with a sheepish grin. 

"Well pay more attention next time! I was just asking if you wanted to help us with something _in the kitchen_," she said meaningfully. 

Raye rolled her eyes, but before she could say anything, Lita was dragging her toward the kitchen, the rest of the girls pushing from behind. "I'm coming, I'm coming!" she cried, trying to free her arm from the brunette's vice-like grip. 

"We _love_ him!" Mina cried once they were away from the guys. 

"He is _so_ way cool, Raye!" Serena enthused. "And _almost_ as cute as Darien!" 

"Yeah," Lita said as she pulled a pie from the oven, "those eyes, that hair... he reminds me of--" 

"Don't even start, Lita!" 

"Brad Pitt," she finished with a wink at Raye. 

"Ohhhh, that reminds me of a dream I had!" Mina said, grinning from ear to ear. "See, someone decided to make a live-action Sailor V movie, and I was picked to be Sailor V, and Brad Pitt was cast as my romantic interest. Well, I wasn't going to take the part because it might expose my secret identity, but you know I always say not to mouth off at a horse's gift, so--" 

"He looks nothing like Brad Pitt," Raye told Lita, interrupting Mina's story. 

"Well, they're both blond." 

"So are Serena and Mina," Amy pointed out mildly. 

"And I'm much cuter than Brad Pitt!" Serena cried with a laugh. "Now come on! We don't want them to think we're in here talking about them, do we?" 

"And what could possibly give them that ridiculous idea?" Raye asked under her breath as they moved back into the dining room. 

"Wow, Lita, that pie smells great!" Darien said appreciatively. 

The chef beamed. "Wait until you taste it! It's a recipe I got off the internet: strawberry rhubarb. I'd never had anything like it, but it's really good!" 

"My grandmother used to make this!" Jay said, taking a piece. "It's my favorite pie, but you can never find it anywhere in Japan. This is great... arigato, Lita." 

"Hai, Raye told me... you don't think I would make anything with strawberries and rhubarb _together_ unless prompted by someone else, do you?" she asked with a laugh. 

Raye blushed and glared at her friend. "You weren't supposed to _tell_ him, Lita," she hissed as Jay laughed. 

"I think that's one of the nicest things anyone has ever done for me," he said sincerely. "Thank you, firefly." He kissed her, which normally would have made Serena, Mina and Lita ooh and aah, but they were too busy worrying about the nickname. 

"'Firefly'?" Serena asked carefully. "How come you call her that?" 

"Because of my fire-reading, of course," Raye supplied hastily. "And my temper... you know all about my temper, huh, Serena?" 

Mina said, "I think it's sweet." She gave a gusty sigh. "I wish I had someone to give me a kawaii nickname like that." 

They all laughed and the tense moment passed, but Raye still remembered the looks on her friends' faces. _Do they really think I would tell him about Sailor Mars?_ she wondered. _I would never... _could_ never... do something like that! It's too important..._ But another part of her, the more rational part, knew that she indeed could, and _might_ if she weren't careful. 

@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-   
"When he smiles at me, it makes me feel like I'm flying, and when he laughs... it's like music! He's just so... so kawaii!" Minako cried as she spun around and around the room. 

"Kawaii?" Rei questioned skeptically. "That's not how Jadeite describes him." 

"Well Jadeite _wouldn't_, now would he?" she demanded, no longer spinning. "I know he doesn't seem that way on the surface, but when you get to know him..." she let out a sigh, "Mal-chan is really just a softy!" 

Makoto giggled. "So's Nephrite!" she told her friends. "Those eyes, that hair... he's so very handsome! I hope he asks me to the ball tonight." 

"Why wouldn't he?" Serena asked. "He seems as head-over-heels for you as you are for him." 

"And what about the Prince?" Ami asked. "Has he asked you to the ball, Serena-chan?" 

The Moon Princess frowned. "I'm sure he will. He's just shy..." She looked up at the blue-haired Mercurial and demanded brightly, "And Zoisite? Aren't you going with him?" 

Ami blushed bright red, but a small smile tugged at the corners of her mouth. "He asked me to save him a dance," she admitted. 

"That's close enough!" Minako cried, her blue eyes dancing with merriment. "Tonight is going to be wonderful," the senshi of love sighed. "We'll dance and we'll fall in love..." 

"Aren't you _already_ in love, Minako-chan?" the Martian Princess asked with a smile. 

"Aren't we _all_ already in love?" Ami said softly. 

* * *

Rei knelt to dodge Jadeite's blow and hooked her foot around his ankles and pulled. She laughed, jumping to her feet, as he fell to the ground with a curse. "I guess I win," she said brightly, "_again_." 

She held a hand out, and he accepted, pulling himself up. "It's not fair," he grumped. "You're too quick!" 

"Iie, Jade," she said, grinning, "you're too _slow_." He said nothing, just pulled his silver and red uniform jacket on over the white undershirt and motioned for her to accompany him back to the palace. They walked in silence, enjoying the sights and sounds of the moon and each other's company. 

"So..." he finally managed as they passed Minako's flower bed, "are you going to the Queen's ball tonight?" 

"Of course," she said lightly, though her heart was pounding. "As a senshi I'm required to be there, but I would probably go anyway. All my friends are, after all." 

"Hai... I heard Mal-kun is taking Minako-san, and Nephrite is going with Makoto." 

Rei smiled. "And they're thrilled. It's all they talked about the entire morning... but don't tell Malachite or Nephrite. I think Minako and Makoto would kill me if they knew I told you!" 

He nodded and said, "Zoi-kun told me he wanted to ask Princess Ami-san, but couldn't get up the nerve, so he just asked her for a dance. I was rather surprised by that... Zoisite isn't usually so shy." 

"Love does funny things to people," she replied, being careful to not look at him, but instead at the dancing, shimmering patterns the water of a nearby fountain made. 

"Once again," he said softly, "that leaves just you and I, Rei-chan." 

Something in his tone surprised her into glancing up at him, and she was instantly lost in the deep, bright blue of his eyes. "I... I guess it does." She backed up closer to the fountain and ran her fingertips over the surface of the water, trying to calm her racing heart. Water, though, was not her element, and it did little good. 

He walked toward her until his face was inches from hers and whispered to her lips, "So will I see you there?" 

Her mouth parted to answer, but he kissed her before she could utter a sound. His tongue caressed hers, moving in and out of her mouth in a way that made her melt in the strong arms he wrapped around her waist. He pulled his lips from hers and she made a little whimper of protest that caused him to chuckle   
in a deep, husky voice. "So will I?" he asked again, letting go of her waist and taking a step back. 

Rei ran a hand through her long raven hair, trying to regain her composure, and said with a mischievous smile, "Certainly, Lord Jadeite. I wouldn't miss it for the world." 

He laughed and, with a bow, disappeared down the shadowy corridor of the Moon Palace. "Well," Rei whispered bemusedly once he was gone, "I guess Ami was right: we _are_ all in love!" 

* * *

It was beautiful, absolutely the loveliest thing Rei had ever seen, and she had been to many balls held by Queen Serenity of the Moon. This one, however, was something new altogether: the spacious, airy ballroom was garlanded with silk of every color of the rainbow, and more besides; flowers were strewn   
everywhere; jewels glittered from the throats, hands, wrists and hair of every woman present; and presiding over the whole thing was the peaceful, silver beauty of the Queen herself. Rei laughed as she caught sight of Serena, the Moon Princess, talking excitedly to the darkly handsome Prince of Earth,   
Endymion. If her princess was happy, then Rei was happy, and no one made Serena-chan happier than Endymion-san. 

Suddenly Rei was swooped up by strong arms and danced out onto the floor. "Such a beauty as yourself, Lady Mars, should never be a wallflower!" the auburn-haired Nephrite cried with a grin. 

"Where's Mako-chan? She might sick her Thunder Dragon on you if she catches you dancing with another woman," she said with mock sternness. 

Nephrite laughed and pointed across the room to where Makoto was dancing with Malachite. "She stole Mal-kun from Minako-san." 

"So where's Minako?" 

"Over there!" The blond was dancing with Zoisite, and a bright, laughing Ami was twirling around the floor with Jadeite. 

Rei frowned. "So does that mean I'm stuck with you all night?" she asked with a wink. 

"Alas, lovely Rei-chan, I'm afraid not. Eventually Malachite will tire of my beloved Makoto, and will commence beating Zoisite about the head and face -- something he really wouldn't do, for Zoi-kun would never forgive him for ruining his beauty -- until he releases Minako, at which time Ami will let go of Jadeite to tend to his wounds, and Jade-kun will come searching for you, Mako-chan for me. Then, my dear, our night of forbidden passion will come to a violent end with -- hopefully -- not too much permanent damage." 

The Martian Princess laughed -- she was quickly coming to understand what attracted her friend to Nephrite so much. "I see you've planned this well, Lord Nephrite. And it looks like your plan is already in motion," she said, gesturing to Malachite, who was bowing respectfully to Makoto as the song ended. 

"Perhaps we can avert disaster by saying goodbye and finding our respective partners now?" he suggested with a smile. 

She nodded and curtsied. "Thank you for a lovely dance, Lord Nephrite. I do hope we can do it again before the evening is over!" 

"As do I, Lady Mars," he replied, bowing before making his way through the crowd to the Princess of Jupiter's side. 

Rei smiled at the way her friend's face lit up when Nephrite joined her, and turned away to go find Jadeite. As it turned out, he found her. "Rei-chan!" he cried happily. "I saw you dancing with that old wind-bag, Nephrite. I hope he didn't bore you too terribly." 

"Nai, actually," she replied, raising an eyebrow speculatively, "I found him quite amusing, and if Mako-chan wasn't such a good friend..." she trailed off, thoroughly enjoying Jadeite's confusion. "I'm kidding, Jade-chan, relax," she said after letting him squirm for a moment. 

He smiled, but his tone was serious when he said, "Would you walk with me, Rei? There's something I wish to talk to you about..." 

"Hai," she said, taking the arm he offered, "let's go out onto the terrace." 

The sky was perfectly clear, not a cloud in sight, and the earth was as full and round as it had been the first night they met. Jadeite smiled at the memory, and stopped to lean on the railing before looking down at the beautiful Princess of Mars. "My fiery one," he whispered, tracing along her lower jawbone with a fingertip, "how I'll miss you when we leave." 

"Leave?" she asked, alarmed. "When are you leaving?" 

He frowned and turned away, running a hand through the waves of his short blond hair. "Soon... I don't know when exactly, but there's some trouble on Earth... we probably shouldn't have stayed this long." 

"But the Prince loves Serena," Rei said in explanation. 

"And his guardians love her senshi," he replied, turning to face her, something sparkling in his hand. 

She gasped as she noticed what he was holding. It was a silver ring, its setting different from any she had ever seen: the main stone was a clear red ruby, which was set between what looked similar to two silver wings, a small diamond in the center of each. 

"I wanted you to have... something..." he sighed and shook his head. "I love you, Rei-chan," he finally said, "and I don't want you to forget about me, because I fear that it will be a long, long time before we're together again." 

A single tear trickled down her cheek as she remembered thinking the same thing only days before as she sat in front of her sacred fire. "Oh, Jadeite," she whispered, throwing herself into his arms. "I love you too," she said over and over as the tear turned into wracking sobs. 

"Rei, don't cry! Please don't cry... Gomen nasai, I didn't mean to scare you!" he said desperately, running his hands through her long, dark hair. 

"You didn't scare me, Jadeite, for I've been afraid of the same thing," she was finally able to say. She slipped the ring onto her finger and smiled. "I'll wear it always, for I could never, ever forget you..."   
@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@- 

Raye woke with a start, her cheeks wet with tears and the last words dream-Raye had uttered still echoing in her mind: _I could never, ever forget you..._ She lied to him that night, for she _had_ forgotten, forgotten everything! How was that possible? How had her mind blocked out the memories of such love, such an over-whelming _need _for him? 

She shook her head, angry suddenly. Jadeite was a traitor. He chose Beryl and empty promises of power in favor of loyalty, love and friendship. Raye had no need for such a shallow man anyway: she had Jay, and Jay was the exact opposite of everything Jadeite represented in her mind. 

So then why were her dreams about _Jadeite_ rather than her current boyfriend? The past... it was far, far in the past, and it was high time everyone -- she included -- realized that the world didn't have to be governed by things that happened thousands of years ago. With that thought, she jumped out of bed and pulled her school uniform from the closet, looking forward to another day of being Raye Hino... _just_ Raye Hino. 

End IV 


	5. Heart's Fire 5

Cycle of Our Souls: Heart's Fire   
Part V 

Raven Moon 

* * *

Disclaimers:   
Sailor Moon and company don't belong to me, blahblahblah. Don't sue! I don't have any money anyway. :) 

As always, this takes place between Sailor Moon R and S, but this time there's a little change: this is the chapter when the conversion from past to present is made. But don't worry, you shouldn't have any trouble keeping track of things. :) 

Oh! And I finally use the song the story is named after. Like I said, it's by Shawn Mullins, and no infringement is intended. 

Please, please tell me what you think! 

I'll just shut up and let you read now. :x   


* * *

Later that afternoon, the girls were sitting in the park enjoying a rare quiet moment. Amy and Raye were studying, Mina and Serena were absorbed in a manga (each, obviously, or there would have been trouble), and Lita was reading a cook book, looking for new recipes to try out on her ever-willing friends. 

Tugging at a lock of curly hair that had escaped her ponytail, the brunette suddenly kicked Raye lightly in the shin. "Well?" she asked, as if the miko would know precisely what she was talking about. 

"Well what?" Raye asked blankly. 

"Have you told Jay about us?" she demanded. 

"You just met him yesterday, Lita. One too many shock-treatments affecting your memory?" she asked sweetly, her eyes glittering with amusement. 

"Funny, pyro. I meant have you told Jay about the _other_ side of us?" 

This caught the other girls' attentions, and each one looked up from her book, and Raye found herself staring back at four pairs of questioning eyes. "Iie, of course I haven't! I know being a Sailor Scout is a secret, and I would never tell him." 

"Never?" Serena questioned. "I don't know what I would do if I couldn't tell Darien about being Sailor Moon." 

"Well I'm not you, meatball head. I'm perfectly capable of keeping this secret to myself, and that's what I intend to do. Besides, telling him would only put him in danger... and that's the last thing I want." 

"You should tell him," Mina spoke up, drawing an astonished look from Raye. "I'm serious!" she defended hastily. "If you don't, he's going to suspect something's up eventually, and you'll make up stuff to tell him, and that'll lead to mistrust and that will ruin your relationship! I've always found that honest people make the best police," she said, perfectly serious as she completely massacred the saying. 

"Isn't being a Scout more important than some boy?" Lita asked with a frown, the memory of past heartbreaks manifesting itself through bitterness towards love. 

"Jay isn't just 'some boy'!" Raye cried before she could stop herself. She frowned and looked away, small white teeth digging into her lower lip. 

Serena smiled over at her friend. "You really like him, ne?" she asked gently. 

She nodded slowly. "I've never felt this way before... and I'm afraid, like Mina said, that being a senshi will come between us." 

"You must be careful with what you tell him, Raye. We don't know enough about him..." Amy cautioned. 

"If he were an enemy, I think I could pick that up with my sixth sense, Amy." 

"There's more out there than just the Negaverse. He could be anything! A reporter, a stalker... you just need to be careful." 

"That's true with anyone, Ames. Don't worry... the last thing Jay Dalinger is is dangerous." 

"I agree with Mina," Serena said after a moment. "You should tell him." 

Raye shook her head violently. "Nai, Serena, I can't! He probably wouldn't believe me anyway." 

"Talk about losing memory... your brain must be charred!" Lita cried. "Have you forgotten about that handy-dandy little power you have known as _transformation_? If he doesn't believe you, show him!" 

"It's more than that, Lita," she said, ignoring her friend's payback barb, "I can't tell him because then he would _know_. Knowledge is dangerous when there are people out there who would like to see me dead." 

"So you're not going to tell him?" Amy asked. 

Raye sighed and rested her head in her hands, tired of thinking, tired of being unsure. "I only have one choice," she finally whispered, jumping up from the ground. "I have to go talk to Jay!" she told her friends, running from the park. 

"So I guess she decided to tell him," Mina said brightly. "I love it when people follow my advice!" 

"I have a bad feeling about this," Serena replied softly, watching her dark-haired friend as she ran away from them. 

* * *

"Raye?" a familiar voice called, the sound echoing through the empty, silent temple. 

"Hai, Jay," the priestess replied from the main room. "I'm in here." 

"I was so glad when you called," he said, coming around the corner and into her view. He went to her and leaned over for a kiss, but she stepped away, turning her back to him. "Is something wrong?" he asked, brow creased in confusion. 

Raye didn't reply, and he couldn't see the sadness in her onyx eyes as she questioned her decision for the millionth time. _Am I really doing the right thing? Yes, it's the only way. But maybe it's not! It _is_. Now get it over with._ She turned to face him with a cold, set expression and said, "Jay, I don't think this is working out." Though the words broke her heart, her voice was tight and emotionless. 

Jay's eyes widened in disbelief. "What do you mean? Are you breaking up with me, Raye?" 

Deciding anger was as good a self-defense mechanism as any, she said haughtily, "Hai, that's exactly what I'm doing. I just think you and I don't have enough in common and aren't compatible. I'm sorry." 

He looked as though she had pulled his heart from his chest and stomped it into a bloody pulp. "Is there someone else, Raye? Please be honest with me. This just seems so sudden... did I do something to make you angry?" 

"Iie, no one else. I simply don't have time for a relationship right now, as I told you the first time you asked me out. Now please, Jay, I have chores to get to." She turned away again and grabbed her broom. 

"But, Raye..." He trailed off, unsure what to say, and finally told her softly, "Ai shiteru, Hino-san." She said nothing, and he left the temple quickly, not wanting her to see his tears, or how much she had truly hurt him. 

Raye turned, tears streaming down her cheeks, and whispered, "I love you too, Jay." Dropping the broom, she ran down the temple's halls and threw herself on her bed, sobbing out all her pain and anger and frustration. 

*******************************   
"I can't believe it's only been a week since I broke his heart... and mine. It seems like two years, or two centuries! Gods, I hate myself and my stubbornness sometimes. Mina was right: I should have told him. I should have told him everything, but now it's too late. Now I've lost him... 

"Hai, Serena, Raye Hino can admit when she's done wrong. And _Gods_ have I done this all wrong! He loved me, but by now he's probably drawn horns on all my pictures and had me declared Bitch of the Century. Why was I so cruel to him? Why didn't I just explain that there are things about me he can never know, things I can never tell him? Why didn't I tell him how much I love him? That might have softened the blow a little bit. 

"But no, I had to be cold and cruel and harsh simply to make it hurt _me_ less. Well that plan didn't work either! His pain is my pain, and I don't think I've ever hurt anyone as much as I hurt him. Maybe I should call him. Nai, he would probably hang up on me, and I don't believe I could bear that   
humiliation. 

"I should forget him. I should move on. I should do my chores before Grandpa kills me. I've spent enough time moping over Jay Dalinger. It's time to remember who I am, to remember and be proud. I am enough without him! Aren't I?" This was the final straw, the final bit of whining that pushed Raye over the edge of frustration. She threw her pen down and returned the journal to its place under her mattress with an angry shove. 

Worrying over the past had never changed anything in her life before, so why should this situation be any different? She had work to do, responsibilities as a miko, a student, a friend and a Sailor Soldier. _A Sailor Soldier... joy,_ she thought cynically, part of her blaming Sailor Mars for the break up with Jay. 

Raye's meandering course took her out of the temple and behind it, back to her grandfather's garden. The summer flowers were in full bloom, and the sight of the roses made her heart ache. She reached out to touch a delicate blossom, but a sudden breeze blew through the bush and she pricked her finger on a thorn. "Itai! Kuso!" she whispered fiercely, sucking on the sore fingertip. 

"I guess it goes to show you can't trust anything, no matter how lovely it appears to be on the surface." 

She whirled around, dark eyes wide. "What are you doing here, Jay?" she asked, struggling to keep the emotion from her face and voice. 

"I came to see you, of course," he replied, his tone casual, his vivid blue eyes unreadable. "I thought maybe you could give me Lita's number. I wanted to call for that pie recipe." 

"You came all the way over here to ask for Lita's number? You could've just gone by her apartment," she said stiffly, careful not to meet his eyes. 

"Gomen nasai. It's obvious I shouldn't have come." He bowed respectfully and turned to go -- this time, she sensed, forever. 

Raye chewed on her lower lip for a moment, wondering, before coming to a decision. "Matte!" she called to him, and he stopped in his tracks, slowly moving around to face her. "I..." she trailed off, not knowing what to say. "I just can't let you go," she finally admitted. 

He ran to her then, scooping her up in his arms and kissing her a thousand times. "My beautiful Raye," he whispered between kisses, "my sweet miko, my stubborn firefly... Gods, Raye, you nearly killed me." 

"Gomen nasai, Jay, I'm so, so sorry! I love you so much, but I... it frightened me and I handled everything all wrong," she tried to explain. "There are so many things you don't know about me, and so many things I can't tell you." 

His blue eyes clouded in concern as he realized how serious she was. "You can tell me anything, Raye, don't you know that?" 

"Nai, it's not like that... I trust you, it's just that... some secrets aren't mine alone, do you see?" 

Jay nodded slowly, though he didn't really understand, and took her face in his large, warm hands. "It doesn't matter, firefly. I know you'll tell me when you can, ne?" 

She smiled beautifully and he felt his heart melt. "Hai, I promise," she declared, tipping her head back for his kiss. Their lips met and her arms went around his neck, fingers tangling in his thick blond hair, as their tongues created a fire between them. Raye pulled away from him, her face flushed and her eyes stormy. "Let's go inside," she whispered, taking his hand. 

Later as they lay in a tangle of covers on her bed, Raye rested her head against his chest and sighed contentedly, letting the warm, soulful voice of Shawn Mullins wash over her. 

_"Let me touch you," he sang, "Put my hands on you._   
_I'll kiss you and we'll see things through._   
_Would you lay with me,_   
_Would you lay with me till the sun peeks through the blinds?_   
_We can stay right here till our heads are clear;_   
_We can lose all track of time."_

Jay chuckled softly. "Rather fitting, ne?" he asked, squeezing her gently. 

She nodded sadly, longing to have the freedom to "lose all track of time" as she lay in his arms. 

_"You are silenced by your memory,_   
_And if I lose you, I lose a part of me._   
_I can save the world,_   
_I can save the world, but I just can't save myself."_

Raye smiled, thinking of her role as Sailor Mars. How true it was... she could save the world, but she had nearly destroyed herself by trying to sabotage her relationship with Jay. Thank the Gods he'd come to the temple that day with his silly excuse... thank the Gods she'd had sense enough to prevent him from leaving. 

_"So I write these lines -- metaphors and rhymes --_   
_till I think of something else._   
_Is there really nothing else?"_

_Nai, Shawn,_ her mind whispered, t_here _is_ something else... Jay has proven that to me._

_"I am here now,_   
_You've got the best of me._   
_So go ahead now,_   
_Go ahead and take the rest of me._   
_There are two of us,_   
_There are two of us -- it's the cycle of our souls._   
_Yet we try and change and rearrange the way the story goes._   
_That's the way the story goes..."_

_Two of us..._ she thought, _just like with the girls and I... there are two of each of us._ Suddenly she realized Jay was saying something to her, and she jerked herself from her train of thought. "Nani, koibito?" she asked. 

"I said I brought a gift for you. Shall I go get it?" 

She grinned and poked him in the ribs. "I thought you came to get Lita's number. Are you saying you _made that up_?" 

He laughed and stood to pull a small black box from the pocket of his jeans. "I'm saying that I'm a terrible cook, and that I would never want to ruin Lita's delicious recipe. Here you go," he said, handing it to her with a sheepish grin. 

Raye gasped and opened it carefully. What she saw made her world seem to stop moving. "What... what is this?" she finally managed. 

"I know you're too young to get married, Raye -- and I am too, I think -- but I just wanted you to have something to let you know how much I love you, and that... that I wouldn't mind spending the rest of my life with you. Kind of a... a pre-engagement ring, ne?" he explained quickly. 

She stared down at the beautiful ring -- silver, with a bright ruby set between two wings, a diamond on each one -- and tried to process what she was seeing. It's not possible! she thought. She shook her head, glancing up at him, and as her onyx eyes met his sapphire ones, she _knew_. "Jadeite," she whispered, her voice as cold and hard as the stone he was named for. 

"Iie, silly," he said, a little confused, "it's not jadeite. It's silver, diamonds and a ruby... I thought the red would suit you. If you don't like it, I can get another one..." He trailed off, realizing that something was   
very wrong. "Raye, what is it?" he asked after a long moment. 

"You lied to me!" she cried, pulling the blanket around her body and jumping from the bed. "How could you?! How could you make me fall in love with you? After what you did, I should blast you away! I thought you were dead. I was _glad_ you were dead. Get out!" 

"What are you talking about, Raye? I never lied to you, and I've certainly never been dead!" Jay said, worried that she'd lost her mind. 

"Liar!" she screamed. "Get out! Get out of my temple! I never want to see you again, traitor!" She shoved him out the door and threw his clothes and the box after him. "Stay away from me if you value your life," she hissed, slamming the door in his face. Raye collapsed onto her rumpled bed and cried   
even harder than she had a week before, the memory of her most recent Silver Millennium dream flooding through her... 

End V 


	6. Heart's Fire 6

Cycle of Our Souls: Heart's Fire   
Part VI 

Raven Moon 

@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-   
It was the morning after what was to be known as Queen Serenity's last, greatest ball, and each princess was saying good-bye to her beloved. It had escaped no one's notice that these could be their last moments together, so the kisses were lingering, the whispers loving, and the tears plentiful. 

"I'll come back to you," Jadeite swore to his Martian princess. 

She smiled sadly. "I know you'll try." 

"_No_, Rei-chan," he declared, "one day I will come back to you. I promise." He embraced her tightly and she tried to shake of her feelings of dread. 

"Ai shiteru, Jade," she whispered, kissing him. 

"And I love you, little firefly." Jadeite pulled away from her and went to join the other generals and their prince. Each man acknowledged his loved one, and then all five disappeared in a flash of light. 

Minako let out a long sigh. "I miss him already," she said softly. 

_So do I,_ thought Rei, _so do we all._

* * *

Prince Endymion watched with a heavy heart as his beloved Princess Serenity faded from view to be replaced by the familiar great room of his Earth Palace. With a sad sigh, he turned to face his generals, only to find them... well, _not there_. He blinked in amazement. "Mal-kun?" he called. "Jadeite? Nephrite? Zoi?" No one answered him. Suddenly he had a very, very bad feeling about this. 

* * *

The four generals of Earth recovered from a rough teleport to find themselves surrounded by a darkness so deep that it seemed alive and the scent of death... old death, decaying death, evil death. "This," Malachite observed astutely, "is _not_ the Earth Palace." 

"Whatever gave you that idea?" Jadeite grumped, rubbing his head from where he'd hit it on a low stalactite. 

"Where are we?" Nephrite demanded as he tried to peer through the blackness. 

"Itai!" Zoisite suddenly cried. "Something has my hair! _Zoi!_" He tried to let loose a barrage of flower petals, but only a tiny puff appeared before winking out of sight. 

"It's only me, Zoisite, don't go shooting your petals around in here," Malachite said sternly, letting go of the other general's hair. "I was just making sure it was you." 

Zoisite gave an indignant sniff and carefully checked his beloved blond curls for damage. Finding them to be all right, he decided that his commander didn't have to suffer a horrible death after all. 

"If you two are quite _through_," Nephrite said rather threateningly, "I believe we have a rather pressing problem. Where are we, how did we get here, and where is Endymion?" 

"I believe I can answer your questions, gentlemen," a voice cackled from behind them. All four generals turned as a bright light appeared surrounding an unnaturally tall woman with wild red hair, green skin and (they shuddered) fangs. "I am Queen Beryl of the Negaverse, and I desire the services of the famed Earth Generals." 

Their eyes widened in horror. "We will never serve you, bitch!" Malachite cried, recognizing the woman as the source of the war on his beloved planet. "Our loyalty is sworn to Prince Endymion of Earth, and you are his enemy." 

Beryl grinned evilly, bearing her fangs. "We'll see about that," she hissed. With a wave of her staff, the cave vanished and each man found himself alone, alone and facing a different Hell, a Hell of his worst fears. 

* * *

Jadeite ran through a vast, encompassing forest that seemed to have no end. He could feel the blood pounding in his head, and he felt as though he was about to pass out, but he kept running. He knew Rei and Endymion were in danger, he could feel it in his soul, his bones, his heart. His prince and his beloved needed him, and there's no way he was going to let them down. 

"Rei-chan, Endy-kun!" he cried, finally reaching the forest's edge. The dark-haired princess of Mars was fighting off a huge, dark beast, and she didn't turn at his call. Jadeite searched around wildly and finally caught sight of Endymion, protecting Princess Serenity from a monster similar to the one Rei was fighting. 

Suddenly a third monster tackled the general from behind. He rolled to his feet and shot a blast of energy at the evil creature, energy it easily deflected. Cursing, he concentrated and attempted to drain its life force, but succeeded in only weakening himself. He heard a scream then, just on the edge of his consciousness, and he whirled to see Rei being hefted into the air, impaled on one of her enemy's long, viscous fangs. "NO! Rei!" He tried to run to her, but an invisible shield seemed to have formed around the battlefield. 

"No! Gods, Rei!" he whispered in horror, turning away from the sight of her bloody, lifeless body. _Endymion!_ his mind screamed, reminding him of his duty to the prince. Shaking himself from the pain Rei's death had inflicted on his heart, Jadeite ran to aid his prince, only to find himself too late. Endymion lay dead, draped over the body of his beloved Moon Princess. 

Jadeite let out a scream of anguish and fell to his knees, his head in his hands. "NO! This isn't possible! Endymion, Serena, REI! I've failed you all!" As his world collapsed around him, he found himself running through the forest again, the blood pounding in his ears, on his way to save Endymion and Rei. 

"This is your Hell, Jadeite, and you will relive it until you submit to the power of the Negaverse," he vaguely heard Queen Beryl's evil voice say. 

"NEVER!" he cried even as he felt the agonizing pain of failure and death rip through him once again. 

* * *

A scream of terror echoed along the peaceful halls of the Moon Palace. Rei, Princess of Mars, awoke with pain like she'd never felt before scorching through her entire body. "Jadeite!" she cried. He was dying, and dying painfully. "No, Gods, please don't do this!" she whispered, struggling to regain control of her psychic senses. The connection to her beloved was too strong, however, and she felt the life slipping from him. 

Her chamber door flew open and Minako, Makoto, Ami and Serena ran, pale and panting, over to their friend. "Rei-chan," Ami said gently, trying to assess the situation, "Rei-chan, what's wrong?" 

"Jadeite," she said so softly they almost couldn't hear her, "Jadeite is dead. She killed him, and the other generals, and now she's coming for us." With that, Rei fainted dead away. 

"She was under too much stress from her sixth sense," Ami explained after a moment. "She should be fine when she regains consciousness." 

The other girls stood staring at one another, their jaws hanging open in horror. "Could... could it be true? Could they be _dead_?" Makoto finally said, voicing their shared fear. 

"Nai," Minako told her, "I refuse to believe it. Like Ami said, Rei-chan was under a lot of stress from her psychic senses, so she could be wrong... ne?" 

"Possibly," Ami whispered, biting her lower lip. 

"What could she have meant? Who is coming for us?" Serena wanted to know. 

"Queen Beryl of the Negaverse," a gentle voice said from behind them. 

"Mother!" Serena cried, throwing herself into the queen's embrace. "Mother, was what Rei said true? Are the generals dead? Is Endymion dead too? What's going on?" 

"I do not know, my dear one," Serenity replied earnestly. "But I do know that tomorrow will bring a great battle, and an army stronger than any we have ever faced before. We must all rest, for we will need all of our strength if we are to defeat this enemy. It will be difficult, but I have faith that we _will_ prevail." 

Serena looked up at her mother, fear in her kind blue eyes, and said, "What if we don't? What will become of us then?" 

"Don't say that, Serena!" Minako cried with surprising fierceness. "We'll win, just like Queen Serenity says. Now come on... let's go back to bed and let Rei sleep in peace." It was the last peace any of them would enjoy for a long, long time. 

* * *

"We will take position here, ahead of the main army. Our job is to prevent any youma from passing through, because we all know that mere swords aren't nearly enough to stop one," Minako, leader of the Sailor Senshi, instructed the other three. "There are only four of us, as the Outers are needed elsewhere, so we must be careful. The Negaverse cannot destroy the Moon Kingdom! With our defeat, so would fall the rest of the Universe." 

Queen and Princess Serenity stepped forward. "May all of you go in health, and return in health," the queen said in blessing. 

The senshi bowed their heads respectfully. "Thank you, Your Majesty," Minako said for them. 

Serena ran forward and embraced her friends. "Please be careful!" she whispered. "I don't know what I would do if I lost any of you." 

Rei grinned. "Don't worry about us, Serena-chan. Just make sure you keep yourself out of trouble, ne?" With that and a bow to their queen, the four girls stepped from the beautiful palace to the gardens and then out the gate. "There!" Rei cried, pointing to the figures in the distance. 

"Gods," Ami whispered, "there are thousands of them!" 

"And we can handle every one!" Makoto cried, raising a fist in the air. The army behind them saw this gesture and began cheering wildly. "Spirit's half the battle," she explained to her friends. 

And suddenly, as though the energy of the Moon Kingdom's soldiers had propelled it, the battle arrived. The senshi fought with everything they had, and numerous youma found themselves barbecued, electrocuted, frozen, or shocked with love energy, but still more came. It seemed as though the supply would never end, and the army found itself falling back again and again until the battle raged inside the gates of the Moon Palace, among its beautiful flower beds and fountains. 

Rei glanced over her shoulder at one point and saw her own bed destroyed, the flowers ripped from the soil and crushed beneath hundreds of feet. She shivered at the omen and blasted a youma that came too close to her. As it fell with a ghastly scream, a great cry went up through the enemy ranks and they fell back, no longer fighting. 

Minako, Makoto and Ami appeared beside her, and the Mercurial expressed her confusion. "Why did they just stop like that? Have we won?" 

"I don't think so," Makoto whispered. "Look." She pointed to four figures making their way through the ranks of youma. 

Rei gasped in recognition and her eyes widened. "The generals!" she cried, much to the surprise of the other girls. "I thought they were dead! I _felt_ Jadeite die. This is so strange..." 

"That _is_ Nephrite! I can't believe I didn't recognize him!" Makoto said, breaking away from her friends and running to the men. 

"Matte, Mako-chan," Rei called, "something isn't right!" The three senshi set off after the rash Princess of Jupiter, but stopped dead when they reached the generals of Earth. 

"Malachite?" Minako questioned softly, not recognizing the blank, cruel look in his gray-violet eyes. The pretty blond took a step back from him, unsure. "Malachite, what's going on? Have you come to help us?" 

"Nai, Sailor Venus," he said in a cold, evil voice, "we have come to destroy you in the name of the Negaverse!" 

Tears ran down Rei's cheeks as she realized the meaning of her visions and the horrible dream the night before. "You did die, Jadeite," she said, "and then you came back as this thing!" Anger surged through her. "On behalf of Mars and the Moon Kingdom, I will destroy you!" 

He grinned maliciously. "How sweet those words sound to me." A blast of dark energy came from his hands just as she shot her fire at him. The two powers locked together, at an impasse, till suddenly they exploded, knocking both the senshi and the evil general to the ground. 

As she lay there, staring up at the dark sky, Rei was vaguely aware of the sounds around her: Ami and Zoisite blasting one another with ice energy, Makoto and Nephrite throwing electricity back and forth, and Mina and Malachite locked in hand-to-hand combat. "No," she whispered, sensing the dissolution of everything and everyone she held dear. "How did it come to this?" 

There was a cry from the terrace of the Moon Palace, and Rei's psychic senses exploded with pain. The Princess... dead... Serena... _Gods, not Serena!_ Endymion, too... Serena, Endymion, Makoto, Ami, Minako, Malachite, Nephrite, Zoisite, Jadeite... all dead... all gone... _I guess it's my turn._

With the last bit of energy remaining in her battered, burnt body, she dragged herself to Jadeite's side. "I'll never forget," she gasped into his ear. Then, resting her head on her beloved's lifeless chest, the Princess of Mars exhaled her last breath and slipped quietly into death.   
@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@- 

"He betrayed me back then, and he's betrayed me now," Raye whispered, the vision fading. "How could I not have known they were the same person? And what am I going to do about it?" With a sigh, she wiped her eyes and picked up the phone, knowing there was only one person she could call. 

"Moshi moshi," Serena said after only a few rings. 

At the sound of the bright, cheerful voice, Raye had to fight to control the tears. "Would you mind... would you mind coming over here, Serena? Please?" she asked, her voice sounding pathetic in her own ears. 

"Raye, what's wrong? It doesn't matter... I'll get everyone and we'll be over there in five minutes, ok? Hang on, Raye!" The blond hung up the phone with a worried frown and hit the "all-call" button on her communicator. 

Knowing she had picked the right person to turn to, the miko got dressed and washed her face, hoping doing so would erase at least some of the signs of her crying fit. Switching over to hostess mode, Raye hurried to the kitchen to prepare tea and cakes for her friends, but stopped, a cake in midair above   
the plate, and let out a little sigh. 

_How glad I am to have them,_ she thought suddenly, her dark eyes trying to tear up again, _at least I have people to go to when I'm feeling like an idiot over a guy. _ With that comforting thought, she finished up in the kitchen with a much brighter attitude. 

"Raye?" she heard Serena call from the main room of the temple. 

"Hai, I'm in the kitchen." 

A moment later Raye's friends were surrounding her, each looking her over with concerned eyes. "I found this on the temple steps," Serena said, holding out the ring box, its lid open. "I thought it was too valuable an offering to be left out there, so I brought it to you." 

At the sight of the beautiful piece of jewelry, her control snapped and Raye burst into fresh tears. The other girls all looked at one another, horrified. Could this be the same stubborn, fiery, no-nonsense miko they all knew and loved? Serena's mothering instincts clicked in and she put her arms around Raye, gently leading her to the table. "Shh," she whispered. "It's ok. Tell us what happened." 

Through her tears, the dark-haired girl told her friends the entire story -- the Silver Millennium dreams she had been having, her inability to remember Jadeite's face, her breakup and makeup with Jay, and finally... the ring. "It's the same one! As soon as I saw it, I knew that Jay and Jadeite are the same person. I just feel so stupid for not seeing it before." 

Mina's brow creased in a frown. "How can you be sure that the dreams were telling the truth? Maybe it was your imagination--" 

"Iie, Mina, they were _real_. I know it because I just do. It's hard to explain... Gods, guys, what am I gonna do?" 

Lita jumped to her feet, fists clinched. "I'll tell ya what I'm gonna do, Raye! That Jay Dalinger, or Jadeite, or whatever the hell is name is, is gonna know the feeling of my Thunder Dragon in a place--" 

"Lita," Serena cut the brunette off with surprising sharpness, "no one is going to blast anyone until we know more about this. Perhaps Jay honestly doesn't remember that he's Jadeite. We don't know what Beryl did to him... maybe she killed him and he came back to life with no memory the same way we did." 

"Perhaps," Raye said slowly. "He seemed very confused by the whole thing... but that might've just been an act." 

"Amy, do you think you could do a scan on him? You could see if there is any Dark Energy remaining in his system." 

Amy nodded and Luna asked, "And if there isn't?" 

"Then I guess we know he's cured, ne? I wonder why they all became evil anyway," Serena said, taking a bite of one of Raye's cakes. 

"Beryl did something to them. In the dream, I said they died... but I don't think that was quite accurate. I think Beryl killed their goodness, the side of them that knew the importance of loyalty, love and honor. Hopefully whatever's happened to Jay has caused that side to be restored." 

"What if it hasn't?" Lita wanted to know. 

Raye shrugged. "Then we'll kill him." 

Mina gasped. "Are you sure about that, Raye? I mean... don't you love him?" 

"I killed him before, didn't I? If he is trying to hurt us, or hurt this planet, then we have no choice," she replied tartly. 

"What about the others?" Amy asked suddenly. 

Serena frowned. "What others?" 

"If Jadeite was resurrected, then it makes sense that the others would have been as well, ne? We should try to find them and see what they remember," Luna explained. 

"Do you think they'll still have their powers?" 

"There's only one way to find out," Amy said, holding up her handheld computer. "We'll need to bring Jay here. Can you call him, Raye?" 

"No I most certainly can't... and he probably wouldn't come anyway. That's the second time I've broken up with him in the last week." 

"Then I'll call do it," Serena said, jumping up from her chair. 

"Nai, matte," Lita said quickly, "let me. If we invite him here, then he'll know something's up. I can ask him to come over to my place for lunch tomorrow." 

"Oh yeah, _that_ won't make him suspicious," Raye commented darkly. 

End VI 


	7. Heart's Fire 7

Cycle of Our Souls: Heart's Fire  
Part VII

Moon Raven

* * *

"There are two of us,  
There are two of us --  
It's the cycle of our souls.  
Yet we try and change and rearrange the story goes.  
That's the way the story goes."  
-from "Cycle of Our Souls" by Shawn Mullins

* * *

Next afternoon the girls were all sitting around Lita's apartment -- well, except for Raye, who was pacing back and forth like a caged lion -- waiting for Jay Dalinger to arrive. "We should just destroy him. Jadeite can't be trusted, as he proved back in the Silver Millennium," the miko said for the umpteenth time. 

"Raye, will you just relax?" Serena gently told her friend. "Everyone deserves a second chance, and besides that, we don't know what Beryl did to them back then. Torture can be very persuasive, you know."

"Or she could have used brainwashing," Amy added. "That's what she did to Darien, remember."

"I don't see why we're all so worried about this," Lita said casually. "If he tries anything, we outnumber him five to one. He'll be toast before he can say 'Kami-sama'."

Mina frowned. "Well I hope we don't have to destroy anyone today. I like Jay."

"You didn't know Jadeite," Raye pointed out mildly just as the doorbell rang.

Lita ran to the door and threw it open. "Jay, hi! I'm so glad you could make it. Come on in!"

Jay smiled wanly at Lita's enthusiastic greeting and allowed himself to be led into her apartment. What was all this about, anyway? Raye had made herself perfectly clear yesterday: for whatever strange reason, the sight of the ring had infuriated her and she wanted nothing more to do with him. It seemed strange that Lita -- the thought stopped midway through and Jay gaped at the sight before him. He vaguely noticed the other girls, each greeting him warmly, before his gaze settled on one, one who would not meet his eyes. "Lita, what is this? I thought you invited me over here for lunch."

Amy had her handheld computer out and was rapidly scanning him. "It's negative, minna," she said.

"Negative for what?"

"Why don't you sit down, Jay," the brunette invited, gesturing to the couch.

"Not until someone tells me what's going on here. I feel like I'm being ambushed," he said, his voice rising in anger.

"Relax, Jay," Serena said brightly, "we aren't ambushing you, we just want to ask you a few questions."

"Questions? About what?" He was beginning to feel like an idiot, parroting everything they said like this.

All five girls shared a glance, and Mina looked back at him with a grin. "Are you Jadeite?" she demanded cheerfully.

"Am I _jadeite_? What kind of question is that? How could I be a rock?"

"Jadeite isn't a rock," Raye said quietly, "he's a person... a very evil person. Amy just did a scan on you, and it seems there isn't any Nega-energy remaining in your system, but that doesn't mean you aren't..." she trailed off and looked away quickly.

He frowned in confusion and sat down hard on the couch. "Raye, what are you talking about? 'Jadeite'... that's what you said when you saw the ring. Do you think I'm this Jadeite person? Don't you trust me?"

She shook her head. "It isn't that, Jay... it's just..."

"Jadeite gave her a ring just like that one a long time ago," Serena supplied helpfully.

"NANI? I thought you said this guy was evil! What were you doing..." Jay trailed off as though suddenly realizing something. "You were involved with him? Are you still in _love_ with him, Raye? Is that what this is all about?"

"Nai! You don't understand! Jadeite is my enemy... but he wasn't always." Raye took a deep breath and shook her head. "It's no good, guys," she said to her friends, "why should he believe me?"

"He'll believe you because it's _true_, Raye," Serena said gently.

Rising from her chair, Raye crossed the room and knelt in front of Jay, resting her hands on his knees. "I'm going to tell you something impossible to believe, Jay, but you have to know it's the truth. There are things about us, and about yourself, that you don't even realize, and I didn't until you gave me that ring." She pulled it out of her pocket. "When I saw this, I was reminded of something that happened between you and I a long, long time ago."

"But Raye, we just met a few weeks ago!" he cried, completely confused.

"Iie, we've known each other much longer than that. A thousand years ago a grand kingdom flourished on our moon, Jay, and Serena was the princess of that kingdom. I was a princess of Mars, Lita of Jupiter, Mina of Venus and Amy of Mercury. You, my dear, were a prince of Earth and a protector of the High Prince, Endymion. You, your comrades and Endy -- Darien -- traveled to the Moon to meet with Queen Serenity in the hopes of forming a peaceful understanding between the long-estranged kingdoms.

"That is when we met, for I was a protector of Princess Serena. You were known then as 'Jadeite', and I loved you as truly then as I do now. I was, and still am, Sailor Mars. My friends," she said with a gesture to the other girls, "and I are the Sailor Scouts."

"But... how...?" he stammered, wondering how she could know... _I _dreamt _of this,_ he thought, _but that's all they were, right? Just dreams...?_

"That isn't all. An evil woman named Beryl somehow gained control of you and your fellow generals -- Zoisite, Nephrite and Malachite - -and you came to the Moon to destroy us all. Beryl almost succeeded, but with her last strength, Queen Serenity sent us all one thousand years into the future. Here, Luna and Artemis found us Scouts and have trained us to fight the evil of the Negaverse... and you were part of that evil. Concentrate, Jay: do you remember Sailor Moon, Mars and Mercury? Do you remember the battle at the airport? You almost killed Tuxedo Mask..." She shook her head sadly. "Or maybe you remember the Moon Kingdom. It was so beautiful and peaceful there... on the balcony beneath a full Earth you gave me this ring, and I promised never to forget you. Do you remember?"

He shook his head. "Raye, I... I don't even believe in Sailor Moon... how can this be true?"

She bit her lower lip. "Do you remember how I told you there were some things about me I couldn't tell you? Some secrets that weren't mine alone? _This_ is what I meant."

"We can show you if you'd like," Mina offered, holding out her transformation stick. "It really is quite pretty," she assured him.

"I know it's a lot to absorb, Jay, but it gets easier with time," Luna said kindly.

His already saucer-like eyes widened even further. "Raye... did Serena's cat just talk to me?"

"She sure did," Artemis said. Raye knew that if cats could smile, he would be grinning from ear to pointy ear.

"You aren't crazy, Jay, and neither are we," the miko said, trying to give him some comfort. "I'm sorry about the way I reacted over the ring, but I..."

"You thought I was your enemy," he said hollowly.

She nodded quickly. "I know you can't possibly believe me-"

"I believe you, Raye," he interrupted.

She sat back, surprised. "You do? Then you remember?"

"I've been having dreams lately, strange dreams about a beautiful, silvery world... you were there, Raye, and I loved you in my dream as much as I do in real life. They were always wonderful... until last night. Last night's was a nightmare, something more horrible than I knew I was capable of imaging." He shuddered.

"Tell me," she whispered.

Frowning, he ran a hand through his wavy blond hair. "There was a woman..." he began hesitantly, "with the strangest hair... red, and it stood straight up. Her skin was green and she had fangs. Her hands were like... they were like _claws_."

"Beryl," Serena said darkly.

"She told us we had to swear allegiance to her," Jay continued as though Serena hadn't spoken. "We refused, of course, and so... and so she... it was Hell, Raye, pure Hell, and that's what she meant it to be. We tried to resist, tried and tried... but she was too strong, and the visions were too horrible. We failed, Raye... _I_ failed. I failed you and my prince and his princess... Gods, Raye, I _killed_ you!" And suddenly he was no longer Jay Dalinger, but Jadeite of Earth, and she was no longer Raye Hino, but Princess Rei of Mars.

"It's ok, Jadeite," she whispered, "I know it wasn't really you. I know, my love, I know. You didn't fail me," she repeated again and again.

The others watched, heartsick, as she tried to comfort him. "It was not you fault, Jadeite," Serena said gently, her voice sounding more like Princess Serenity than Serena Tsukino. "We don't blame you, and we don't blame the others. Queen Metallia was the evil, and Beryl her henchman. They're both gone now."

"Are they?" Mina, her voice unusually bleak, asked. "Are they really gone, or is this just the beginning?"

"We're stronger than we were then," Lita said defiantly. "Beryl was a walk in the park compared to the Dark Moon family."

Serena shuddered and she was suddenly herself again. "And you didn't even have personal contact with Prince Diamond. He was _way_ gross."

"And Beryl was Betty Crocker?" Lita demanded.

"I don't think we'll have to worry about Beryl anymore," Raye said softly. "She's dead."

"So were we," Amy pointed out.

"More than once," Luna agreed.

"And so was Jadeite," Mina said with a frown.

"Iie, Beryl didn't kill me," Jay spoke up. "She... well she froze me in a block of ice. It was worse than death, really, because I could still see and hear everything that happened. I was her personal museum relic."

Raye shuddered. "That's horrible," she whispered. "I wish that was one memory you hadn't recovered."

He smiled wanly. "No, firefly, memories like that, though terrible, are good for you. They make you strong and smart and quick. It's not something that I'll let happen to me again, I assure you."

Serena frowned and chewed on the end of a ponytail before saying, "So is that what she did to Zoisite? I killed Malachite, and Nephrite died in Molly's arms, but what about Zoisite?"

Jay shook his head slowly. "Beryl was displeased with Zoisite because he harmed Tuxedo Mask against her orders. She set him on fire."

"Itai," Lita muttered ruefully.

"Indeed," he agreed dryly, "but that was Beryl."

There was a long, sad silence before Lita said, "So what now?"

"Now we wait," Amy told her. "Just because we saw the others die doesn't mean they won't be making an encore appearance as well."

"And it seems to me," Raye said slowly, "that this is happening for a reason, as though we're being prepared for something."

"I agree," Luna said. "We should all be especially watchful in the weeks to come. Things have been far too quiet recently."

"_This_ is quiet? People coming back from the dead?" Jay asked.

"Well considering _we've_ come back from the dead _twice_, this is practically nothing," Mina told him with a giggle.

"You consider being born 'coming back from the dead'?" Lita asked warily.

"It was in a way," Artemis said, "since you'd all lived before."

Raye rolled her eyes. "I think we're gonna go, minna," she told her friends.

"You aren't staying for lunch?" Lita asked, jumping up from her place on the floor.

The miko glanced at Jay and a smile touched the corners of his mouth. "Nai, Lita," she said, "I think Jay and I have a lot to talk about." Hand in hand, the two walked out of the apartment, leaving the others to share nods and knowing smiles.

And a sigh. From Mina, of course: "They're just so kawaii, don't you think?"

End VII

* * *

So that's it for the Raye/Jadeite section. Please tell me what you think! 

Thanks to all who have written me with positive feedback and Joe for being my ever-willing reader.

Check out "Cycle of Our Souls: Heart's Love," the next chapter in the series, if you liked this story!


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